DAY 13
Dear Roland,
you were my first love at the age of 21.
Yes, I was really a late bloomer, but consider to my low self-confidence it is even a miracle that I really began to open myself for this experience and to a man.
We had wonderful romantic dates, movie evenings and lots of fun together. All this “normal” couple stuff. And you where also the first man that tried to convince me that I am beautiful and I don’t have to hide my body. But my wounds were too deep that I could believe you.
And after one year of our relationship, I finally had to admit, that I made the same mistake my mother had mad with her first husband.
Because you were to much addicted to alcohol like my father was. During the week everything was fine, you only took one beer in the evening. But on Friday, Saturday and in the morning of Sunday you were drinking so much beer and harder stuff that I began to worrying about you.
And for the next year I really tried to convinced you that you have a problem but you always refused and kept going.
And then something happened that hurt me deeply. At a working party you cheated on me with a colleague and your excuse was that you were too drunk to resist. You begged me to forgive you and swore that you would love me and it would never happen again.
I couldn’t go on like this, so I had to leave you after almost 3 years of our relationship.
For a long time, I was mad at you and hated you a little bit. But today I know, that all this was a part of our soul contract.
But there are still bad bonds between you and me that I have to cut to change in a way it’s meant to be.
So, I call you my guides and all the light beings around me to help me cut these bad bonds.
I am going to take the big golden scissors now and cut the lines to lost love, breach of trust and losing confidence.
All that is left now is the unconditional love for my first love and I wish you all the best in the world.
Thank you, my guides and all the light beings, around me, for the help to heal these wounds.
Thank you, Papa, for this opportunity, I love you.