DAY 99

Dear hole,

I always felt like there is something in my life that takes all of my happiness and turn it into doubts and fears.

Like a hole, that is sucking in all of the good moments and memories I had in my life to later turn it into something different, into something bad.

Today I know that this hole is my ego mind. This bad habit in my life that loves to life from drama to drama. Creating fears and endless loop thoughts to hold me in a state of doubts and hopelessness.

And now that I am working on it to turn this situation inside of me, oh boy did I got brainfucks all over the place.  

In every weak situation I am in, this ego is always waiting for me and uses every little piece of chance he gets.

But what he loves most is fighting with other egos by provocation whenever he can.

Oh, how pissed was my ego yesterday when I really was aware of his doing and stopped it to fight, defend himself and getting stronger because of it. Oh yeah, he tried really hard to make me react, especially when the ego from my counterpart also provoked me to get any reaction from me to make himself stronger by putting me down.

It was kind of funny to observe these energies that I could literally feel flowing through my body searching for a place where they can start messing with me.

But I concentrated on the present moment and felt a special state of inner peace.

That was so goddamn awesome.

And that is what I am trying to do from now on.

I know my mind will now try to break my resistance, but this is an organic growth. It has started and I will not stop until I fully remember what is deep behind that ego that my sneaky thoughts created, I have to break down this identity in me, because it has to be.

Thank you, my guides and all the light beings, around me, for your support in this process.

Thank you, Papa, for your unconditional love and for these opportunities, I love you.

DAY 100